Governor Kinky?

No, not Jim McGreevey. Not Arnold, either.

Kinky Friedman is running for Governor of Texas!

Why? you ask. "Why the hell not?" Friedman replies, echoing the campaign slogan bannered atop his Web site.

"I'm an independent, which is the party of George Washington, Teddy Roosevelt, Sam Houston and Davy Crockett," Friedman said in a phone interview from his ranch. "Voting for a Democrat or a Republican is like choosing between paper and plastic."

In one breath, Friedman sounds every bit as earnest as Jesse Ventura, the ex-wrestler who was elected governor of Minnesota as a Reform Party candidate in 1998, or Arnold Schwarzenegger, the Republican actor who became California's governor in a free-for-all recall election last year.

Well, not quite true. TR was a Republican, and I believe Crockett and Houston were Democrats, though I could be mistaken.

Friedman says he is for legalizing casino gambling in Texas to help fund public education. He wants a thorough review of the death penalty to make sure innocent inmates aren't being put to death.

He would ban the declawing of cats on grounds that it's inhumane, and end political correctness on grounds that it has wrought an era of "wussification" in Texas. He blames big money for corrupting politics and will try to limit his own spending campaign spending.

"Last time (in the 2002 governor's race), Rick Perry and Tony Sanchez ended up spending $100 million trying to help us decide who we hated the least," Friedman said, referring to the Republican who won and the Democratic who didn't.

In the next breath, the one-time front man for the Texas Jewboys who penned such cult country classics as Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed and They Ain't Makin' Jews Like Jesus Anymore sounds like he is riffing between sets at the Broken Spoke saloon in Austin.

Asked about the line in his January 2005 column in Texas Monthly where he suggests that as governor he might invade Oklahoma, Friedman offered a deadpan reply that gave no hint of whether he really would order troops across the Red River.

"I hope it doesn't come to that," he said. "I hope that a war with Oklahoma can be avoided."

Mainstream party operatives are keeping a watchful eye on Friedman's boomlet, not wanting to fire back at his barbs for fear of being seen as mean-spirited or humorless, and not wanting to alienate a potential constituency in the event that the singer bows out.

"Gov, Perry believes that the political arena should be open to all comers and all ideas," said Robert Black, a press aide to the Republican incumbent who plans to seek re-election.

Kelly Fero, a Democrat, said a Friedman candidacy would energize the race and become a net plus for his side, regardless who the party nominates.

"The Kinkster will be just one more candidate beating up on Rick Perry, or whoever the Republicans vote for in '06," said Fero, pointing out that U.S. Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison and state Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn are considering challenging Perry in the GOP primary.

Friedman, a University of Texas at Austin graduate who was born in Chicago, dismissed both observations as self-serving pabulum from the political pros.

"The professionals gave us the Titanic, amateurs gave us the Ark," he said. "Career politicians are ribbon cutters. They see the governor's office as a job. I see it as an opportunity to make that Lone Star shine again."

Given what we're facing in 2006, a Kinky candidacy may be very attractive to a lot of voters. Whoever emerges from the GOP primary will be pretty chewed up, while the Democrats have no one other than Sanchez who has publicly expressed interest in being the 2006 sacrificial lamb. If Kinky Friedman can offer a coherent platform that resonates with Texas voters, he could emerge as the winner.